Novels

Sunday, 29 November 2020

Despite Them



And when I saw online what art is worth to other people in the consumer marketplace, my self esteem emerged. 

The struggles for acceptance, for value, in a dehumanisation culture where artists are rejected as wasters, shunned with the same grotesque and ferocious distaste as are drug addicts and homeless, criminals and beggars, the diseased and mentally ill, by vile lower level state workers assuming their supremacy and righteousness to be the experts on life itself and how things are done in the civilised world of human endeavour, which is to say all are beneath them unless earning more than themselves in which case...

...in which case my every spare space crammed with canvas I struggle to find happiness in because the image they portray is different than I imagined, recognising myself to have the same cynical attitude toward my produce as the bastards have toward me, frustration they don’t do what I planned, don’t fit precisely my intention. A projection of alienation from these inanimate objects, artefacts worth nothing to me because displeasure at imperfect rendering, and yet... 

...my canvas are inanimate things capable of enhancing life by invigorating emotion and expanding the soul of the viewer who perceives into them and from them...

...while I distasteful to the critics am worth less than objects whose price tag is beyond their ability to afford anyway... 

...for the very same reasons...

...a matter of perspective. 

This is not arrogance on my part. I prove my skill at boosting the National economy every time I create a goods of value, which is far more than the derogatory critics will ever do. Why then have I allowed myself to be ground down by them for so long? The canvas I hoard and hide in a state of ashamed inferiority are worth more collectively than those people’s annual income, to some. 

I am my own expert in life, I need not those who cannot afford to live in the world I inhabit, of creatives and beauty, of golden hearts and good souls, of muses and buyers of art who appreciate the work and the value of artists who may someday after they’re dead be remembered several generations later in mythic form by lovers of life, collectors of art, those who sail the same seas of vision and passion high above the scope of those whose grinding down of hope is a way of life. 

Here, I have the final laugh even after my death. For by these works shall I be remembered while those whose bitterness caused me to suffer, whose malice destabilised my enjoyment of living at all, they shall be forgotten not long hence. 

I alone recall their faces and the cruelty and cunning by which their covert abuses were permitted by others like them. 

Who are these evil bastards? I would say, safely with a sweeping generalisation, those petty office workers who work within the states pyramid structure in positions of relative authority. I have encountered so few exceptions and so many examples. 

This fuels the subject matter for my art, a purging of emotion, of grief at the mistreatment of good and hopeful hearts by those whose nasty envy creates the depression, whose lies fill official paperwork with libels they get away with because the authorities protect one another from exposure at the cost of truth, at the cost of better people than themselves. It was true in Shakespeare’s time and Dickens, as it is true today. 

Remember, Plato was forced to drink poison by the state for preaching liberal philosophy. Christ was tortured and murdered for preaching love and taking a stand against the usury which is a crime against God. 

It has always been this way, the sociopaths in positions of social responsibility and their fake respectability commit and get away with corruption and crimes against humanity, every generation endlessly. 

But it is those who create, compose, invent, inspire, who are remembered through the echo of centuries with gratitude and respect for their having enlightened us all by their activities, by their dreams of a better world, a better world where they truly belong. 

Through the pains are our spirits honed and our message refined, and always as our histories and mythologies recurrently reveal, do we come to this same conclusion. 

The abusive controllers are the problem to our communities because they delude the zombie masses that peaceful freedom thinkers are the problem to our species. 

A harsh lesson in life, life for what it is. 


A Pattern



It is written for the perspective of a man/woman however it applies equally as valid to woman/man. I did not use “they/them” gender-greyness because divisionism is counterproductive, also it is from personal experience.


.1

She wants him now

He says maybe let’s wait


.2

She wants him now

He says maybe let’s wait


.3

He wants her now

She says No too late


.4

Typically never happens

Both gone different directions

stop communicating




We can recognise from this pattern there to be two types of people. Those who give up if they don’t get laid within two meets, and those who require more than two meets to feel comfortable sharing pleasure with a person. The division line on when a person moves on depends if they are getting what they are looking for: 


Friendship First vs Disposable Shag


The intention to allow a person to get to know you and to care about them as a person rather than a sex toy. Needs of the body with no other accountability. This works only where this is made clear from the start otherwise it is manipulation which can perhaps be forgiven as insecurity and inexperience rather than accused of narcissism for intentionally inflicting emotional entanglements from a person engaged in developing friendship and emotions toward the player. 



Citrine

Most people need healing after relationship breakup especially where there are children involved in a timeshare which is the majority culture in Britain now. Even if no children are involved the following meditational mantra has been created to facilitate internal change toward a happier state. It is written for the perspective of a woman however it applies equally as valid to a man. I did not use “they them” gender greyness because this is personal and intimate. It has to be for it to work best. It is a positivity based strategy for creating long-term successful relationship with someone you can’t ghost or gray-stone. 




I want to be, possibly have to become, the person he falls in love with again and regrets losing for the rest of his life. That will be sweet vengeance. My behaviour towards him will fulfil this agenda.


I will establish firm boundaries. No matter how much he desires me, and no much no matter how much I may at times desire him too whether I admit it or not, I will respect the boundaries of capital letters NO. He will never touch me again. That is punishment. 


I am fully aware an apparent narcissistic tendency invoked by my controlling him in this or any way. Although I would prefer to have absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with him ever again, I am not in a situation to do that. I must therefore accept my situation as the reality and stabilise myself in it. 


This means to accept a dynamic will exist between us and that I have an ability to control that dynamic. No matter what I do nor how I act and react with him, we will be affecting each other psychologically, emotionally, practically, et cetera.


I am now ready to seize control of that dynamic which requires nothing more than self-control which is a major aspect of self-respect. I am fully capable of self control. He will no longer control me because I will establish and reinforce firm boundaries. These will be normal humane social boundaries based on respect of any other living being. I am aware it will at times be challenging.


I shall be the sweetest ex-partner imaginable. This is how I shall control the situation. I am fully equipped naturally to do this already. He will experience no venom from me. This shall be my discipline. The stronger I am the stronger I become.


This is the purist path towards the situation of universal love where all anger, anxiety, hatred, eventually dissolves. I must train him to value and respect me. To accomplish this there must be no reason whatsoever for him to devalue and disrespect me. I understand well that humans being fallible do occasionally fail at such honourable tasks, myself included. I will forgive both myself and him for failings and continue toward positivity. 


Where I have to bite down bitter venom and swallow it myself, I will find more successful ways to accomplish that. There are many. I am intelligent, creative and compassionate, I am certain to find multiple methods which suit me. Our human culture offers many diverse appropriate outlets. 


I am physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, geared toward expressing and expelling all emotions including the purging of toxic thoughts, feelings and behaviour; safely. 


I will break the bridge of targeting him with hate through which he targets me with hate. 


Somebody has to be the bigger person. I knowingly choose and accept myself for what I am, to be that bigger person. 







Friday, 27 November 2020

DropTheBomb


Here in the west we fiercely defend our perceived right to run around being delusional monkeys, bumping into one another and treading on each other’s toes, competing for the same dwindling supply of imagined treasures and pleasures.  

I’ll tell you eventually the entwined stories of two musicians I jammed with, both of whom have military-related background, so as to understand the deeper story they are both components of despite their never having met. It explains very much about the Western approach to domestic defences. 


Meanwhile an exploration and understanding of chaotic behaviour as an approach to warfare. It thwarts any ability to pre-empt attacks. Fighting an enemy whose strategy is random causes confusion. 


Does the random combatant have a pattern at all? 


Certainly they have a desired outcome even where there are multiple potential approaches to the outcome. This can be controlled for instance if there is only one vantage or target it is necessary the enemy will gravitate toward that vantage or target. We’re drifting into Dune territory here (Frank Herbert). 


Clarity of thought is applied by the minority who are functional sufficient to attain and sustain it. All grids are seen. All parameters known. All vantages and targets recognised. The swift path to ultimate success is obvious. Therefore pre-emptive. 


Okay time for that story. It deserves a title. 




The Penny Drops 


by snakeappletree 

c2020 Ordo Octopia



Part One: 4 Minute Warning


This is a true story. 

It happened in 2006. 


“I worked for the military. Highly stressful job. Eventually I had enough. I quit and joined the band. This is much more fun. For four years I was posted at the bunker at [classified]. My job was to guard the door. It mostly involved standing around doing nothing. I was provided a list of names and a gun. In event of a nuclear war I was to compare the ID (identification papers) of anyone who turned up trying to get into the bunker, with the list of names. If their name was not on the list I was to shoot them. One shot in the head, dead. My name was not on the list, I was not important enough. After the door sealed I would have a choice to shoot myself or to go out into the world to watch the bombs drop.” 




Part Two: Radar Device


This is also a true story. 

It also happened in 2006. 


“I made up with my dad. You know he always wanted me to work with him? We got hired by the MoD (ministry of defence) to do a contract and from that it’s all opened up for us. The contract was interesting. They asked us to have a look at a broken radar. We got there and the control box had rusted shut. We jacked it open to get to the circuit. The problem was easy to fix, it meant replacing a part but the broken part has not been manufactured since the late fifties. My dad had to reinvent it and build them a new one using modern components which means we own the patent on the device. Then the MoD told us they want us to update all the broken radar systems across the country, of this type of radar. None of them have worked since the 1960s. We’re entrenched in the damn system. Do you remember they taught us in school about the threat of nuclear war with Russia or China?” 



Aftermath: Sound Of One Hand Clapping


As I overlaid these two experiences I recognised it immediately. 


Despite the radars built as an early warning system in event of nuclear missiles flying through the skies toward Britain not having worked for half a century - during which time the television media reminded us on a regular schedule about tensions between our nation and the rest of the world - underground military bunkers for key personnel to survive months of nuclear wasteland until the radiation had subsided sufficiently to make it safe to emerge - bunkers guarded even today by armed soldiers with their list of names - that was never going to happen simply because the radars were offline even during the peak of the Cold War. 


It was a ruse maintained to create simultaneously both a false sense of security and the fear generated by comprehending such thing to be necessary, which it never was. 


A tactic of domestic control: live in fear but don’t worry, we are protecting you because we know what we are doing and by the way Your name is not on the list. 


Or, and I truly do not know if this is better or worse... the people controlling the bunkers and the people controlling the radars continuously for five decades or more had so entirely failed to communicate with each other, they had no idea the futility of posting armed guards at  private bunkers. 


Or... the bunkers despite probably being capable of sustaining life for several months underground, are not primarily used for that purpose. Yet they still require an armed guard with shoot-to-kill orders anyone not listed. 


More questions than answers. The only definite answer is the scale of a lie told to the public regarding the situation. 










ARK

I might have blogged about this before. I can’t remember. Which proves a point. It’s an important one. Keep reading. 





ARK


Let me tell you about a video game. It’s called Ark. Basically it’s a building and dinosaur fighting/taming survival game. It’s difficult. It’s multiplayer on internet which means you can team up with random strangers indeed this is intended as necessary for survival to encompass required skill sets. 


For six months to a year American and European gamers enjoyed it, some of them eventually attaining the games equivalent to relative god status by beating everything possible in the game. Most players never got remotely close to that. 


The game was opened up to China. Within two weeks China had beat the game, doing more, getting further, faster, than American and Europeans had achieved in a year. 


Why? 


Because of the notable difference in the Chinese approach to problem solving. 


Wave one: Explore and identify dynamics. Communicate the data lucidly and succinctly to all (processes in bullet point).


Wave two: People fell naturally into roles to achieve goals. People not stop until they had achieved their personal target as quickly and efficiently as possible. 


The difference between Chinese method and USA/Europe is attitude. 


In the West, exploring and identifying dynamics was not done methodically it was done sporadically and randomly. It took a long time to learn the dynamics with a lot of trial and error. 


The data was not communicated to all even where this would have helped the other players in their own team. Competitiveness between individuals inhibited progress. 


Failure to communicate lucidly and succinctly inhibited progress. Ability to assimilate lessons (processes in bullet point) was proven lacking. 


Westerners did not fall naturally into roles. No structure is innately a part of the western psyche. It was revealed the opposite to be true; more individuals fought against that structure even when it cost their lives. 

The exception being during commerce where fair trade was interrupted in equal measure by raids. No holistic cohesion with equality respect for others in the same team battling the same hostile environment. 


Westerners took time out from their assigned mission and then quit when it got too hard because of deviation from the bullet-point process. 


China’s ARK players recognised all this about Western mindset faster than Western ARK players recognised this about China. 


Now USA wants to go to war against China. In future, we will all be learning Mandarin. 


Tuesday, 24 November 2020

Three Camps




What we want is a planet full of happy people. 


We recognise that a small minority can only be happy when everybody else is unhappy. 


The extent of their manipulations has affected all aspects of the fabric of our communities. The name for that is Society. 


Everywhere you have had to compromise your natural harmony, you have been affected by that corruption. 


We recognise also the only way we can achieve a planet full of happy people is to reduced to zero the number of people who are only happy when other people are unhappy. 


Isolating those members of society is one possible step in the right direction so the community can prosper without their negative influence. 


A more extreme approach would be to cold blooded cull to take out the worst elements for the benefit of all. 


However, as soon as we create a situation where a group exists to do the culling, to decide who to cull, the abusers will step into that role and make their own rules. 


Therefore it cannot be resolved by this drastic situation. 


Likewise, the creation of any hierarchy power base will enable such abusers to occupy positions where they are unaccountable for their actions. 


Likewise, the enforcement of isolation of the abusive element among us. 


We know from vast experience how manipulative such abusers are, in justifying their antisocial actions through persuasive negotiation. 


With the awareness outlined above, the only solution is self isolation with encouragement from the surrounding community. 


On this principle, the formation of camps. The pyramid and the circle. 


Within the circle is a realm of equality while within the pyramid is a realm of tier-based control systems. 


Between those two camps as a third area, the realm of that which is beyond any established human contextualisation. The wild has no formal symbol. 




The Cage




They built a cage around me by forcing me against my intuition to do things for them, things I didn’t want to do. 


To become somebody who they wanted me to become which was not my own natural me and who I wanted to become. 


It took years for me to begin to dismantle this programming. 


The trappings of it all around, the cage which has been built on me to crush me throughout my life. A cage which syphons my energy through their idiom, their id, and into their egotism. 


As I dismantle the cage, my energy returns to myself instead of going into them. They get weaker as I get stronger. 


The lesson here can be applied to the state the structure of the hierarchy system of the corporate design of society. 


All those cage bars symbolised by the trappings we have to take into our lives by compromising with the society, those are symphony’s which drain  energy from us. 


Some people have it worse and are constantly chasing energy, usually in the form of money or positions of authority above other people. 


That whole hierarchy system is a deck of cards which will come crashing down as people pull out of it. 


We need our energy for ourselves now to survive. We have no energy to give to artifices that others may syphon our life force from us. 


No more compromises with delusions and illusions.

The Pot





This is one drop of delicious. 

It goes into the pot. 


This is one drop of rare purity. 

It goes into the pot.


This is one drop of exquisite experience. 

It goes into the pot.


This is one drop of perfection and this also goes into the pot.


This is three drops of harmony. 

In the pot, plop plop plop.


This is one of the most special potions. 


Now we will add five drops of luck, this particular luck being the very best available. 


These ingredients are very hard to come by. 



And now for the lesson.


This is one drop of deadly toxic corruption.  

This also goes into the pot. 


Now we will stir it. 


And now we will share it and drink it.


Why are you were stepping back away from the pot? Is the potion not good enough for you? Oh I see, the addition of deadly toxic corruption means it’s no longer safe and all those ingredients are wasted.


Now you understand why we do not blindly trust, why we test, why we filter for only the best. If we permit one drop of vice, one small lie, one impurity into our group, we no longer serve the purpose for which we deserve our position.


This is why groups form naturally in harmony with nature and need not tell any others who do not need to know. To force any such organisational structure is necessarily poison against the flow of evolutionary harmony. 



IntoTheBlue3

 



There are two systems for working out the dates. In one, we are already halfway through the age of Aquarius. In the the popular one, we are at the very start of it. Given the timeframe  people in several generations from now will also be at the start of it. 


The system for measuring where we are at now after the Age of Pisces. 


Remember the diagram I drew on the beach of Pisces, with the two fish representing culmination toward an apex and then the aftermath of the apex as the singularity mutates into many forms? 


Each Age is measured at about 2100 years. So if Christ was born at the start of Pisces two thousand years ago, we are now entering Aquarius. 


But: Christ represents the culmination of a thousand years of gestation into a singularity symbolised by one person, and his birthday (Gregorian year zero) is in the middle of the Age of Pisces, after which the message of Christ mutated into many different forms (which it has with so many divisions of the Christian religion), it means Pisces ended circa 1050ad (1066 ring any bells?) and Aquarius began at that same time - indicating we are in the middle of Aquarius already. 


Applying the lesson of Pisces to Aquarius, the dogma from the past is to imprint “now” with the pattern of the past, it means we’re at the equivalent to the Christian birth apex point. After which is segregation as the message (unity) resounds toward an expanding and increasingly chaotic expansion. 


What we are living through? Travel and Communications technology and global reformation. Consequence of the pollution which had enabled that (plastic, metal, chemical, radiation). It’s ecological awareness. That we are all 80% water, the same water we have been poisoning. 


At this time, to liberate ourselves from the resonance of the imprint left by the previous Age is to stop working toward a singularity (empiricism) at the middle and to diverge into many unique individual directions. 


Pisces: everything pulls toward centre, distils into a purified essence and then expands away from centre taking that essence with it, which mutates as it expands. (age of distillation). The singularity is Love. 


Aquarius: all about the stuff we encounter which causes that essence to mutate. (age of experience). We convey the love, the focus is now on embracing the external. A quest for novelty. 



IntoTheBlue2

 



The amount of deconditioning it requires for people to fully wake up. Even our language / concepts, has been rigged. 


We need ego. The reason we think it is a bad thing is to discourage us from figuring it out. I am not advocating egotism. 


Why do we use the word “ego” ? 


Because Freud and Jung, psychology model. 


What do they have to say about it? 


There are three components to the mind and five components to our experience. 


External stimuli (sensory)

Internal stimuli (intuition, emotions, nervous system, body awareness). 


The three components of the mind are:


Id (idiom, what we aspire to conform to and be recognised as)


Super-Ego (dogmatic, conditioning, experiences) 


Ego (the weights and measures system which puts the other four aspects into a functional order). 


Without ego we are disfunctional. 


So, what did society do? 


Society told us to hate the ego. 


It told us this so often and in so many ways we reject it. We assign the word as a derogatory concept to anyone who is...


...never mistake confidence for arrogance or egotism. 


They’re closely related. The social rejection of egotism is used not only to prune people’s egotism but to knock people’s confidence. It’s a belittling, grinding us down where we should be rightly proud of accomplishments. 


It’s built into people’s frames of references because the language we use creates a cognitive bias. 


That’s one example of how deeply the brainwash goes. 


A lot of people can’t deconditioning without having a mental breakdown because the shock of how entrenched it is, how much they rely on a false structure for stability. Often it’s more kind to not decondition them.


Sansara - “the confused or conditioned mind.”


That’s the super-ego, tempted by the id. Society has refined that delusion.