Black Cats

(re-posted to livejournal from webjam on 2010.08.27 at 20:13)

Tales of the Black Cat

yesterday, friday 13, 2008; I bought the Counting Crows album ‘recovering the satelites’ cd from a charity shop for 50p on my way to pick up my new van. it's great having money, I didn't have any at all for half of last year because the dwp dodge their paperwork, so between begging borrowing busking and starving I took them to court and they were ordered to pay up by a kind judge. three months later the money came through. I haven’t heard this album since I was made a copy of it by a woman who got me drunk then raped me when I was a teen, my first sexual experience with a woman. prior to this I had only been raped by a guy after he dosed me with something sleepy, which is how I know that I am heterosexual but that's a different story.

my new vehicle bought through ebay from a really genuinely lovely guy called Nick. at 1am I tried to chug up the slope on the village common outside my dads place to park the vehicle out of public view and it ran out of gas situated right next to ‘the tump’ in which is buried a celtic queen, a few meters from the smallest christian church in the region. the van had exactly enough gas to get her to exactly where she needed to be on a journey she is supposed to be making, almost as though somebody has written this into the pages of a fayrietale that I am living. something mystic in all of this connections, considering the ongoing war of assassins between self righteous and misinformed christian conquistadors against the naturalistic/supernatural pagans. i looked at the church and considered that she may be a vampyr van unable to cross onto consecrated ground. the whole village is on sacred celtic turf and my allegiances are pagan! i was humored today (st valentines day) when the christian priest & his wife could not get their own car up the slope to park next to the church as they usually do because the van was blocking it, but that's me picking up on small minded belligerent small community dogmattitudes. what is funny about this will make more sense as you read on.

today by sunlight I noticed that the vehicle has a big black lion silhouette sticker on the barn doors at the back. it also has one on either side. I didn’t see this from the pics on ebay. three big black CATS. of course black cat is my spirit totem; it is lucky when one crosses your path. there is a legend that black cats seen skulking around christian cemeteries are the devil who is also known as old nick, plying his trade.


tonight my dads gf arrived back here and told me that she had just seen a black panther as she arrived into the village, it crossed before her car and melted into the shadows of the hedge.

the region in which I live has a place named Cwmbran which means ‘fountain of Bran’. Bran the Blessed is a Welsh Celtic legendary hero. cwmbran council have erected a huge metal sculpture featuring three RAVENS or perhaps they are CROWS. these are the spirit allies of Bran whose oracular head is now situated in the white hill upon which is built the tower of london. ravens live & are kept here because they are protecting Brans head. the legend says that when Brans head leaves this site, then ‘england will fall’. three, because Bran is thrice blessed. three, because the celtic triple~braid also known as Ogham, symbol for the druidic tree~script and pronounced ‘ohm’ exactly the same as the buddhist chant ‘aum’. it means ‘well of life’.

when I was about 17 years old I spent some time in Germany in the Black Forest region. here, I remember the name of a town called Magdeburg where they held the famous witch trials, where the vacuum was invented and a Void first recreated by scientists who were then murdered by burning because the Void is considered ungodly by CATholic christian conquistadors. although I cannot definitely say that this town is where this church building I am about to describe is located, it is in the region somewhere around there and Schoenebeck. but there is a church in Germany which has a huge cast iron black metal gate on it. I photographed this gate because it is awesome and inspiring. I photographed this gate because a voice was guiding me to do so and telling me that it is part of my life journey in such a way that I would more fully understand later in life. having read steven king's Dark Tower series I am now really beginning to understand quite a lot of things about life that didn't make sense to me as a kid.

the gate

when I returned to uk I made a crude lino cut and from it lino prints of the  unusual german church gate. lino is a fun tool to use because it is easier & safer to carve than woodblocks. for this image I used black petrol based ink to make my prints. I don’t know what happened to the photo but I still have both the lino and one of the prints I made from it. it was in my folio when I was accepted into university to study Art.

the gate attracted my attention because the handles are unusual organic shape similar to the hr giger designs I so much admire. there is an image on this gate of two creatures. one is a black BULL, the other is a black LION. the bull is stomping the lion when the gate is shut. it reminds me so much of the yin~yang that in my mind, I read the symbols on the gate to mean that when the gate is open, the black lion will be stomping the bull.



another time I went to Germany was with a very special lady friend who I have not seen for ten years. together we danced the processional walkway of Ishtar the Love, War, Fertility goddess of Babylon city, the city was excavated by Germany prior to world war 1 at the dawn of the twentieth century and taken to the Berlin Museum. the spectacular site has 3D relief ceramic tiles in yellow on a blue ceramic tile background. the walls of the walkway are lovely. the two motifs on it are a stylised yet studied bull (my friends astrological sign is taurus) and an equally stylised DRAGON (my chinese horoscope sign is year of the snake, and snakes aspire toward dragons). there is more backstory here, she lives in the county of Somerset (Somer as in Sumeria as in Babylonia, Assyria, Set as in Seth or Sukhet, the Egyptian / Assyrian SNAKE God). layers and layers of meaning rippled through the processional walkway as we danced. our relationship ended when we were split up by christians jealous of our shamanic powa. since I was driving through taunton, somerset (tau or tao being an important ideology in our beleif structure) I stopped off to see her yesterday, a surprise visit after so many years. she wasn't home but her boyfriend has the same buzuki as I do and we spoke of folk~music and egypt, he has also spent time there. it was great to catch up with her family, meet her black cat (of course) and to have a cup of tea half way back, I haven't driven in ten years either and it was a journey of many leagues. 


in autumn of 2007 I traveled to usk to visit my mother and to go spend some time out in the forest there. she drove the car and as we traveled I explained my theory of symbolism and multi~layered reality, how this is relevant to human psychology and our understanding of cause and effect. how different people interpret the same event in very different ways, depending upon their own personal paradigm and symbolic association system. I believe that such experiences where lived events are full of mythical symbols, are what the ingenious creators of the TAROT are explaining to us. this in itself is taoist philosophy. certainly, real egyptology relies upon a good understanding both of mythepoesis and of multiple layers of meaning within a single symbol.

“for example” I waffled as my mam patiently listened while driving through the night. “in front of us is a black car, the tail lights of which are red and shaped like fangs of a creature. and between them is a white symbol that means ‘life’. to us knowledgable 21st century people we know that it is a clever car design to attract the subconscious buyer toward purchasing the vehicle based upon imprinting of primal patterns. no doubt the driver associates with and feels like they are a deadly night time hunter of some type.” my mam continued driving and continued patiently listening to my waffle. “and yet to a medieval person, such as a scryer seeing into the future, they would not understand that it is a vehicle, they would see the symbols and decide that we are chasing a DEMON of some sort that has black chitinous armor and red fangs dripping with blood and a life sign like a yin in the center of a yang. this is why medieval scryers saw in their future, which is our now, that humans would become enslaved by demons. they did not know what computers are, etc. it is the same for us now when we look into our future.”

prep sketch from 'thirteenth moon' series

when we arrived at my mams place, we stopped the car and were amazed because standing outside the shop next to her witches cottage is a huge black HORSE with a white dash on its forehead. in my mams shed at the time is the black wooden UNICORN head carving I had made from a tree root rescued from a bonfire.
[insert pic of unicorn carving]
 (my mam borrowed the unicorn horn from this sculpture)

it was the night of the autumnal darkmoon (new moon).
I took my backpack and walked into the fields and forests. I asked openly to the place, which way do I go to find the spot where I can camp? and within moments I saw a black cat plodding through the field, jump through a gap in a hedge that led into the forest. so I followed its route and through the forest came to another field where I made my camp at the edge of the forest. I did not need to light a campfire because I was plenty warm enough doing my buddhist yogic breathing exercises. later in the night I tried to kindle a small fire but it would not light and I gave up & cooked my cous~cous on the portable gas stove instead. but before that happened, I just relaxed and star~gazed for a timeless while. I really needed to shed the chaos grid of having been living in the city for too long and my thoughts gentled into the natural darkness until I was at peace.

this meandering zone of relaxation was broken when I realised that only four meters away from me is a very confidant and very sexy black PANTHER. she pauses in her silent stride to look at me and smile. now physically the black of our eyes did not meet. had they, we would have been freaked out and we would have gone feral and run or fought. I saw her eyes glowing white like pure electrical torches, like stars, lighting up the space into which she looked. and then I was locked inside my minds eye. I saw the core of her eyes and she saw mine, totally unblinking, inside our minds. the blackness all around me, totally absorbed me, is all i am made of at this moment, all there is and I have met the core of my soul, it is blissful. her soul raced up through me from the kundalini points in my base chakra, perhaps an inch either side of my perineum. I saw... here is where language is insufficient. I was, I am, we were, both together, existing and experiencing as, white light; shooting up through my meridians and out of the top of my head. electrical and lightning. then we were both up in the sky together making love. it was not sex, it was Love, unity, completion that took us beyond time and far beyond flesh. this experience is how I Know that astral travel is real. it is the sweetest most pure beautiful honest sex I have had and the most deeply penetrating, it was four rays of light twisting together and our heart was one heart. our minds were the same mind and for weeks after this incident we held telepathy with each other as pure and as loving as true real love is. she was inside me for a long while and when I feel for her now as I type, I sense that we still have the bridge. many changes occurred in me thanks to my feline lover. she was amazing. and then I am in my body seeing through my bodies eyes feeling like I did when I smoked DMT, as she smiles at me and happily resumes plodding into the forest knowing utter safety in my presence and I in hers.

later I found a film that has a clip describing this thing with the electric lightning flashing up through the tantric points. also I discovered Hypersthene a man~made metal crystal that is very erotic for the effect it has on the nerve tips in the skin.
[insert hypersthene vid clip]

as she walked away my eyes readjusted focus. I enjoyed discovering the new way that I can use my heightened senses. I stared at the outline shape of trees directly in front of me above where she had stood. behind and penetrating through these trees are two white lights from distant hills a few miles away. the trees stand up above the hills on the horizon and it looks like a black cats head with erect ears and the body of a snake coiling around me. I think she is sitting watching me as I watch the horizon. I trust her too and we feel happy together. we speak together in our heart that is our mind.

how did a wild black panther come to be roaming around the border between south wales and england? there is a well documented colony of them living somewhere on Bodmin moor in southwest england. they are thriving; their being black creatures of the night and unafraid of humans, also no trouble at all to humans for they hunt only small wild animals for food and stay far away for the urban human world. 

or could it be something more mysterious yet?

one of the very best books I have encountered about Mayan culture and Shamanism is the brilliant ‘Mayan Shamen: Travellers in Time’ by Patricia Alloe Mercia. her research involves discovery that during the time when the boy king tutencaiman was taken to Paris in the19th century for a big egyptology exhibition, there are newspaper reports stating that dozens of people had seen black panthers in the streets of Paris whilst the boy king’s mummy was there. the research done by egyptologists into verifying this fact with egyptian scripture has made a conclusive understanding that the black panther is the spirit ally of king thoth~ankh~amun.

my own research has made many connections between egyptian and mayan spirituality, for a start both of them are the JAGUAR priest~hood (that gives the game away). they are both focused around transmigration of the soul. Patricia explains that King Tut is the very same soul as the snake lord, king of the mayans tombed in the temple of Palenque; Pacal Votan. the priests identified him because his left foot bears snakeskin patterns. Pacal Votan is also Wodan in Norse mythology. these links are the tip of the iceberg; there are many stories here for another occasion that further verify these connections and add a lot of proof to what for now we will simply describe as mythepoeis. needless to say that the black panther is also the spirit ally of Pacal Votan the snake lord.

the round table

the Saxon word ‘Mercia’ by the way is one Arthurian legend name for what is now parts of wales and of england; the old kingdom of this area of the world in which Merlin was born and lived and traveled and fought to hold a kingdom together despite foolish kings. the events regarding Mercia as a kingdom occurred around a thousand years ago.


I am fortunate enough to have traveled through north france and although I will not reveal to you the location, there is indeed a site hidden in a very mystical forest with a hand carved wooden sign advertising ‘le tombeau de Merlin’. of course the site is exactly like the one mentioned in the story, a tree growing out of a large rock. I have just looked this up in google. the photos are of a modern site obviously for tourists and is not the same location as the one I remember visiting when I was a kid. alright I will give you a clue, to get to the site from the uk ferry to france, you have to travel through ‘le ville du chat noir’.

the whole region is covered from horizon to horizon in big foot long rusting metal shells of anti~aircraft bullets beneath a thin inch of earth. the guns were a constant barrage. this entire landscape is forever scarred by the second world war. it boggles the mind to contemplate the massive scale of it.

although I am not nazi and do not encourage nor endorse nazism or fascism of any sort, the following link is interesting and has relation to the story at hand. my own experiences with nazism are rather more than I would like to confess to. they are useful to be on good terms with when you have information such as the address of a known male rapist; nazis don't like pedophiles. also I have a friend whose dis~owned grandfather was a very important member of the uk nazi party. what david icke says in his books is the very tip of the iceberg. the technology that exists, and the abilities people have, are far, far beyond what the state encourages us to believe is even possible. but again, these are stories for another time.

 cLick Giger's pussy for Vril
for a few days a voice has been whispering in my ear to learn about the Vril Society, so tonight I typed the name into google. I find this info to the Vril Society interesting, being a spiritualist myself and having recently been compiling information that involves a very similar idea to what the vril society were discovering about reality and which science has since then called 'dark matter' as an aspect of quantum THEORY. my own research into practical use of QT to enhance the Magickal Universe as evolutionary development is largely based on stone carvings I have seen inside sarcophagus that are also the source of seichim (egyptian reiki) methods.


ftr, for the record, I really don't care whether or not you believe a word that I am saying here. I know heart of hearts that all of this is absolutely Truth, because I lived through it. I am experientialist. the very first translation I made of Egyptian hieroglyphs is 'we see as we say'. it is to remind us to be honest and this is the foundation of all spirituality. I treat this as a religious discipline.

only by being True ourselves do we know what Truth is.
that's taoism

captains log 16.2.09 supplementary:
today I noticed something on the back of the van from when somebody was once using it as a business vehicle. the stickers have been peeled off from where they had their telephone number on it as advertisement. the number has 696, which is the celtic triple braid, followed by 77. I was born 6.9.77

I had this poster on my wall as an art student

I met a girl called Kat who is blackwitch, we had a kid born  in the chinese year of the tiger, then we split up and I met a woman whose middle name is Cat and who has a lot of peculiar stories about them, for example 3 of her cats giving birth the same week so she had 30 of them in total, named after myself and the street I live on before we even met, those two used to visit mere here a mile away from her house, before we even met.

I don't think I yet retold the story of Zooport 'city founded on blood' as remembered by the stain glass windows in Caerleon (fort  of the lion) church, which involves a black cat in it too.

Black Cat Pavement Splodge II 10.6.2013
Today I walked to the co-op in the village in sw wales I moved to a few years ago. I saw a paint/grime spill on the street that caused me to stop dead in my tracks. It was identical to the one I had seen previously, approximately five years previously, in zooport city se wales when I was subsisting there. I returned with a camera to photograph it to compare the two images. For me this represents the start and end of a cycle.

In art school I studied abstract expressionism. One ritual was to draw the marks on walls and observe the mind’s pattern seeking ability to recognize them as imagery instead of random arrangements of construction and decay. This theme continued to run throughout my exploration of art and psychology, perception and psychedelics. Jungian Archetypal symbolism; we project our personal programmed symbols onto external reality for referencing, we receive symbolic information from external reality for the same purpose.

That the image represented a black cat (symbol) which has frequently made sense of my experiences. I have already anecdoted several of the related stories and have not gotten around to writing about most of the others. Even as I type this, a big sleek black cat, mistress of my 8 month old ginger tom called Ninja, is yowling outside because she wants sex. Were only humans so honest.

This second black cat pavement splodge has a cats head with a mohawk on the body of a snake, with its head cut off. Off with her head, said the Queen of Hearts, said the Green Man, while Jalal Uddin Rumi phrased it 'off with the roof' to the same intended meaning; forget Mind and see with Truth! Aztec/Mayan temple art depicts headless people with serpents for chakras coming out their necks.

symbol of the black cat, my waysign,
seen here with white lightning through its mind...
posted to Kink/Moko phone website 2007
The first black cat pavement splodge had a similar snake body that I did not fit into the photo at the time, which was the same week I split up with basket-feather-owl.

While I was standing on the first pavement icon, leaning against a wall, I had a shamanic experience of watching hers and my own kundalini sawtooth waves moving in and out of a perfect interweave, a lesson in chakra spectroscopy and life waeves.

Information that takes a while to assimilate and longer to express given that we do not have sufficient words in the English language to do so. Hence Symbolism in Art.

Hence making new words up within the formal structure that are the right and proper words for the concepts discussed. Sooner or later the reader will catch on to what is being described - it worked with Anthony Burgess.

twenty-four hours after my sons 3rd birthday, two years to the day since his mother walked out on us.  This black cat pavement splodge represents  (amongst other layers of meanings) one of two collapsed waveforms of the dense past, ending  in the same week for me; I have my self esteem back at long last now that a good dentist has replaced the hazardous waste material amalgam with ceramic in one of my molars on a meridian line that has been blocked for twelve years since a cowboy dentist Richards of magor did an unnecessary operation after my dad bullied me into going to an appointment he had made on my behalf. During this op my sacral and solar chakras literally rose up off the chair; these same two chakras were identified as 'missing' during my chakra health analysis two and a half years ago. The blockage has gone!  


Just before Christmas 2015 I met the mother of Aylessa. My short story about this is to be published in Feburary 2016 issue of Bright Metallic magazine. I have also made reference to it HERE (Update: 21/12/2015 / Ninth Gate).

The little black manx cat (inbred and so has no tail) born in my bedroom two years ago and who disappeared because she went wild, did not like living indoors, did not like being neutered - as a responsible human adult I believe it a social duty to prevent the growth of problematic urban feral cat population. She does occasionally return, for feeding and to see her mother who lives in the garden shed. The little black cat, we named Velcro.

I named my first SecondLife avatar after her, finding that it is preferable to stare at the female digital form than the male one, because I am heterosexual and not, as common misperception, because i secretly want to be female and am using SecondLife to come out as a gay. I am hetero.

The Kitten Velcro lives next door to The Girl who is Lucifer from the Ninth Gate movie, Aylessa's mother. They know each other. This is an example of why ancient cultures worship cats. They see things we do not. Their grids include spiritism as an obvious life factor where ours seldom do. We learn a lot from them.


As we enter Gregorian year 2016 (Mayan Year 3 given 2013 to be Year Zero): I sold my MC505 which is a different tale, related HERE. The following is a copy/paste from the Additional Notes of that tale, because it entwines with this one.

Thinking about how Parcelforce were delivering the MC505 even as I thought about it, I could feel its energies and was detaching emotionally and psychic from it as it came into the hands of its new owner. I was cycling along a route I do not usually take; a car slowed down as it drove past.
Sometimes when time slows down, what the Matrix movie calls ‘entering bullet-time’, it is significant of entering into a zone which is functioning at a different tempo, its particles functioning to different set of physics based on its internal system dynamics rather than being effected by external. Einstein made equations about this and materialism. Jaguar Priests of Egypt and Maya made equations about this in a different way connected with spirituality. Sometimes it simply is just a car slowing down, moving at a different frame-rate of time, than the observer. 
The car was black with the white triangle motif and red eyes which I have written about elsewhere. 
I took note of its license plate: NX10 ~

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