Wednesday, 13 December 2017


How extremist fundamentalists create fundamentalists from otherwise community oriented optimists. 
Or, an immovable state vs an infinite flow.

Being a writer, it is expected that the intention is for the choice words to be released for public consumption. I question: When I write something I am happy with, is it self indulgent vanity to want to share it?
Others might like the words. Certainly the message is something that has been bottling up, brewing, trying to get out for some time. Expressing it concisely is rewarding because then I can move on from it and develop, can finally let go of that issue.

Sometimes the best words are result of conversation and discussion, of being questioned about life by people curious, dedicated and courageous to get to know me and to let me get to know them. Healers, deeply involved in discussing the topics which are both taboo and yet are cultural money-spinners because we all have dealing with and issues with those topics, which society tells us we must not air in public.

Society is an abuser, period.
We need to delve into the complex and dirty emotional mental experiences, that is what life is, that is how we learn, progress, grow. Internal mechanics processing external affectors.

I do not have consent to copy/paste quotes of private conversations and neither is it needed, if accredited anonymously. Such conversation is catalyst for revelation and necessary to put the revelation into context.

Those are the best people to speak with, the wisdom keepers, the healers valued for their insight. For those are the shamen amongst us who set us right, by gently shaming us into facing ourselves, by use of perceptive inquiry. Estcheemah describes them as the Zero Chiefs, those whose unecessary names will be forgotten by the long history and yet whose work is fundamentally important to us, to individuals. Those of sage kindness who reach out to help us, to mend our communities without singing about it from the rooftops.

This is why I opened this text with a musing about vanity. I want to say thank you by sharing the wisdom provoked from me with others who might benefit from the healing. It feels good to release tension by putting into words that which has bothered me.

Writing does not change the situation at hand but it helps comprehend about it, to deal with it and to share it with others who may resonate.
It's personal, hence the puzzle of whether sharing it is a self indulgent act even when intended as an example of situations so many of us identify with.


I look back at my teachers. In the academy I was fortunate to have had two, both of whom were criticised by the academy for not being professional and academic enough to please the state, and yet who taught me vastly more than any other working through the state machinery.

Outside of the academy, many teachers, mentors, guardians, none of whom would have stood a hells hope of securing professional academic employment even had they wanted and attempted that.

And then I think of all the conformist so-called teachers, those who ticked all of the academic boxes, were recognised by institutions as model professionals, yet who taught me nothing at all of any value and indeed if anything generally discouraged me from pursuing education at all.

There is a reason why the word 'academic' is properly defined in the dictionaries as 'irrelevant'.

If there is one lesson the educational system and life outside of it has taught me, this is it.


The other great teacher is attitude. By attitude, I thanked my narcissistic abuser for helping me to become master of zen. Without which petty tyrants I would remain a blunt edge, useless and full up of all knowing potential.

Bonsai is the bowl of restriction, not the perfectly formed tree it contains. Stunting is a dangerous and thrilling act of endangerment which improves personal esteem, though only when the balance is perfect. Else it is foolish bravado of no real substance, an illusion, a delusion. That balance comes from the spirit of the tree, not from the clippers which shape it. Thus it is natural to kill and replace those who we surpass lest we become them.

Attitude is developed whenever a voice of a deeper truth is stifled by authoritarianism domination. The patience of a patient patient grows from an injured juror who knows to be the ultimate decision maker even after the storm has been weathered and passed. When the moment is right, the most effective action is at once, minimal and with farthest reaching consequence. Consicion is consciously refined by confinement. This is attitude. Meantime, breath.

We fight totalitarianism not head-on for it is formidable, but by biding our time, studying, observing, learning the shape of it through hardships inflicted. Usually by this method we watch it fall of its own internal corruption long before we are positioned to become an effective counterstrike. Meantime, breath.


 "Usually you'll know a tree by its fruit. 
Likewise, you'll always know the kind of person you're dealing with 
by their vibration/voice/energy;
 that which they choose to rebroadcast into the world."
Julia Howe

Clever Fox Media


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