Saturday 19 September 2020

eValu


“No one is responsible for your happiness but you.” Will Smith



Beliefs become hardwired as our way of thinking. They become rigid absolutes. This is unhealthy for us.


Why is it one person believes one thing, a different person believes a different thing? The beliefs are software not absolutes. They are opinion, not truths. Humans commonly mistake beliefs for truths and act accordingly. They control our behaviour. 


So, if people are full up of nonsense but believe it, they behave like idiots. If people are full up of sense and believe it, they behave sane. 


To be sensitive is to be open and receptive to many different ideas, without necessarily having developed an ability to critically judge between fact and fantasy, right and wrong, good and bad, sense and nonsense, truth and delusions. Such people are vulnerable. 


In my 30+ years of counselling, I would say this includes most people to such an extent that the ones who are an exception of the rule are notable because they stand out. 


I put them into two categories, those who rigidly will not back down and yet are full of nonsense versus those who rigidly will not back down because they are aligned with the truth. 


You have to know truth to be able to recognise it in other people that’s a huge part of the problem, as soon as you accept and believe in and mistake a lie as a truth you are delusional. 


The ability to tell the difference between a lie in the truth begins with questioning everything instead of unquestioningly accepting information and mistaking it as truth, believing in it.


The second factor which helps to develop the ability to tell the difference between a lie in the truth is you’re never lie.


Again, the factor of delusion plays its part because unquestioningly believe in a thing to be true and acting accordingly, without identifying if it is true or not, undermines our ability to tell the truth.


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A simple board game. 

The board game grid is 11 squares by 11 squares. The game last for 10 rounds. You begin in the centre of the board at one edge. Opposite you is the finish line which is called the truth. To your left and you’re right are the sides of the game board which are called delusion. Every turn you move one step. If you have chosen to stay aligned with truth you move one step forward towards truth. Any other choice you move sideways instead of forwards. If, by the end of the game, you are still floating around somewhere in the board and have not cross the finish line and left the edge of the board, you are living in confusion and delusion.


In real life we do not have ten turns to assess the truth and align with it, we have one and it is continuous. Sadly, the vast majority of people are floating around in a sea of delusion, because they are not aligned to truth.  


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Any opinion is a belief not a truth. Therefore to mistake it for truth is delusional. Check your belief structure. Is your self doubt based on truth or delusion? If you identify that your self-doubt is based on delusion, reassess yourself. Say out loud: “I choose to no longer in power this delusion because it does not serve the truth.”


First step of this is to accept and this is very often the most difficult thing to do. 


“I accept that I was wrong up until this moment. As of now I go forward having consciously decided to align with truth.”


“I am not a piece of scum. I am worthy.”


“Everybody makes mistakes so we can learn from them, it does not make us bad people.”


I’m sure you have the imagination to invent whatever positive self talk is relevant to your circumstances.


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Because of this (above), it means anything anyone says is not immediately by default the truth. It is their opinion. Therefore it is probable that it is a delusion. 


If someone says (anything at all), do you:


a. Immediately be convinced it is the truth without questioning it?


b. Reject it as bullcrap?


c. Assess it to identify if it is truth or belief, if it is opinion, delusion, nonsense. 


d. Decide which, a b or c, is most relevant, depending on the circumstances. 


The ability to critically judge which category a thing is, is a life skill. 


The ability to reject anything which is not truth, is a life skill. 


Most people do not develop it very strong because most people are not trained to think clearly. 


People accept delusions and suffer the consequences. 


You don’t have to be delusional. You get to choose who you are, how you react to other people’s statements of opinion.







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