For 17 years a woman has systematically repeatedly destroyed my life at every opportunity, out of malice, spite and envy. She has told me to my face her motive is because she is jealous.
A week ago she was found dead. I suspect it was another vodka and pharmaceutical overdose, two years after the last time she did that, which gave her a stroke and put her in a coma.
I have tried for years to get her the help she has needed. She was clearly psychiatric.
In part because she misrepresented my attempts to get her professional help through the system as male domination, misogyny and undermining her sense of being “a strong independant woman who don’t need no man”, the authorities attitude has been to accuse me of being the problem and to not support her.
She has reported hallucinating ghosts of dead babies clawing their way out of the walls to get to her. She has clawed and smashed holes in her walls and doors in an attempt to frighten them off her. There are witnesses to this.
I do not believe I was ever the problem. I believe drugs, alcohol, bad decisions and bad company had made a psychiatric problem much worse.
I have taken her to hospital for emergency operations after she has been involved in drunk driving incidents. I have done everything I was able to support her. I long ago stopped giving her financial support because she spent it on street drugs and vodka. She stated repeatedly the reasons she hated me is because I won’t fund her self-destruction.
She had me wrongfully arrested for crimes she had organised, for revenge and as a joke. She would show off about it to my face when nobody else was around. Her friends were involved in that.
I did make police reports about her for some incidents. They would never act on it. The police told me that as a vulnerable female they would protect her rather than warn her, even when it meant for example whitewashing evidence supporting my claims. Including video’s threats of violence, text evidence of attempted blackmail and threats of further false allegations and theft of property. I do believe it has to do with her being a police informant albeit a corrupt one. She took dealers out to protect other dealers.
Being the target of that level of domestic abuse by somebody like that is something I have had no support for.
The National Domestic Abuse Helpline told me they are for women only. The idea of female to male domestic abuse is not something the local system workers are able to compute. Eventually I was told to ‘try mens sheds’ whatever that is. I had to explain I am heterosexual; there is lgbt crime support.
There is no support for men who are put through this intense level of ongoing hate crime.
I entered 2026 with news of her death. It’s a shock to the system. I am free of it. I don’t know how to feel. It’s data to process. Emotionally I am still stunned. I actually feel like I want to cry. It’s like coming up for air after bursting your lungs with suffocation for so long.
She split me up from one relationship by telling my girlfriend I had been accusing her of being a pedophile. I never did.
She and her friends split me up from one relationship by getting me arrested for animal abuse which I did not do and when that did not work they told my girlfriend I had slept with one of them. I never did.
She split me up from one relationship by telling social services I had tried to kill a child and social services backed her and told my girlfriend I was a danger to children. My girlfriend saw through it but her parents and friends did not, they pressured her into ending things.
The woman did not want to be in a relationship with me herself. I asked her if the jealousy was because of that. She said no. Said it was that she wanted me to know what it feels like to be controlled, and to have my life destroyed. She explained it by saying; “smash the patriarchy.” “All men are bastards.” “Let you know how women feel.”
This post is in memory of her.
RIP
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