Shame/Narcissism/Feminism/Healing

Echo and Narcissus, John William Waterhouse, 1903,
commonly used illustration of how projected grids affect working context to the delusion and disillusionment of involved parties

Disclaimer: For the purposes of this text, specific gender pronouns are used. While it is equally accurate the other way around it is vastly more common in the community to encounter it the way specified here. This use of gender bias is done purposefully, it should become apparent by the end of the text why it is necessary in this context. This said; a core principle of the outline concept is that in most cases, 'it works two ways'. 

Shame/Narcissism/Feminism/Healing

The shame and guilt reflex. 

Trauma becomes behavioral patterns.

She needs to hear somebody say, I am sorry. 
And for her to believe it, to accept it. 

Until then, every relationship she has which can possibly be exploited into the shape required, for the partner to apologize to her. She has transferred the need. It is no longer the original person who needs to apologize for that to her, it is whoever is providing her supply/support. 

The trauma possibly originated in childhood from a parent or a caregiver, or from a significant other eg; spouse. In any case, it is the breaking of trust which is resulted in trauma and developed into personality disorder. 

A significant portion of the population carry versions of this around. People on the narcissistic personality disorder spectrum as a result of trauma, need their partner to apologize to them. So therefore they bully and belittle significant other until that person conforms and plays at the role for their healing. Whether the person has consented to this game or not, it is the closest possible in liminal terms because they are a supply, supportive of the person. 

It does inflict injury on the partner by the process of cajoling and positioning him into a situation where he feels apologetic. This subtle form of abuse is called recontextualisation and usually developed in stages but can occur in one fabricated situation in which the narcissist is moving the goalposts. 

What happens next, as the shame and the consequence, the pattern which is grown from the shame, is projected outwards instead of being faced up to, is it becomes toxic. This is the narcissist internal mechanism, it then becomes the context clouding the relationship. For the narcissist is the purpose of the relationship which is being used as leverage so that they do not have to face the same reflex but can still maneuver around it. That partner is the fall-guy being manipulated for that purpose. In most cases, neither of the partners are aware of it and in many cases because there is so much trauma in the community, both partners are playing at various levels of this. 

For relationship counseling; identifying personal shame and trusting your partner to work through those processes with you, should be something which occurs early on in the relationship preferably before engaging in sex because that further complicates matters although trust relationships being what they are… Are preferable than disposable sex partners. We will need sex that’s a given. It’s only a problem when games are played using sex as leverage.

What happens next is the relationship between the person needing to hear sorry and inflicting that position onto their partner, both fall within roles which are very easily misinterpreted. Smokescreens and distractions veil the underlaying energy structures. 

The partner feels targeted and put out, and recognizes this, is in a confusion of withdrawal for self-preservation with being exploited by routine behavior to respond to the narcissists reward/control system. It is much more complicated and confusing when sex is involved because then it functions on every level of our being and the entanglement is a much more complicated entity to untangle.

The narcissist on the other hand is not receiving the full support and supply required and which they are used to, decides their partner who is not reacting by apologizing, is useless and a waste of the time. 

From both directions, resentment grows. 

One of them decides to leave first, creating a vacuum space of misperception which cannot be healed by communication because there is none, hurt feelings and uncomfortable environment. Usually it is the provider who is the more badly damaged, who chases after the narcissist because, As a result of their independence and self esteem having been ground down completely, the relationship has become a reference on which the victims well-being also balances. 

The narcissist uses this, because after having emotionally ended the relationship, all the effort is coming from the target, trying to fix things while feeling apologetic regardless that they were the provider. 

The police see that chase as being the target is the troublemaker. Empathic Psychologists see that as the target is having a breakdown because of what the narcissist has done to them. Most of the time, relationship breakdowns involve low-level narcissism from both sides. That’s actually quite normal because we’re dealing with humans and not robots.

This situation is exploited by the narcissist who created and projects it, only to exploit it. The narcissist can identify the target as being the abuser, for not supporting them fully in the way they need it, and for harassing them after they cut their losses. 

The narcissists support/supply network encourage the narcissist to avoid the victim who in their collective network is a bad person who must be avoided and punished if possible, for the injury they have caused to the narcissist. 

The source of this injury is her unwillingness to face a shame and he’s not recognizing his role in replaying her past trauma to heal it and the drama which has resulted from it. She does not want to heal it, she does not want to face that and so she involves her intimate partners in the circle around it, creating a black hole into which the part of falls, so that she can label that person as the bad guy to seek her revenge on the original trauma while at the same time not having to face it.

She will repeat the pattern in every relationship she has until somebody says sorry. 

At which point, if she accepts it she will feel superior and healing process can begin. 

Narcissism includes domination, superiority complex, grandiosity and aspiration; a specific social position which she wants to achieve. If it’s not achieved she feels a failure all her miserable life, once she has achieved it she will use that authority to maximize the size of her supply/support network. 

The Societies infrastructural systems support the narcissists ability to achieve such position of authority within it. A mental belief that anybody who does not respect its structure system is a threat to the society, is the reinforcement of the righteousness of narcissistic control. 

Those who can see the whole for what it is, correctly identifies the situation and the necessary steps towards healing the people involved; both the victim of the narcissist and the narcissist who is claiming to be the victim of her victim. In both cases, apologies are needed and needed to be accepted as authentic rather than lines spoken by actors for the sake of convenience. Narcissist rely on face value fakery, they are believable lawyers and expert actors.

Identifying a persons relationship with their own sense of insecurity, inferiority, shame and guilt, is essential for the counselor. The counselor must himself dedicate an unusually large amount of time to analyzing and identifying those factors about himself so as to be able to accurately do so for other people. 

Traditionally we use the word ‘shaman’ for one who does this. Shame-man. The word also means shah as in noble and relates to chi as in energy. In the west the Society refuses to acknowledge shaman to be a real thing. Shaman are counselors and community healers, reminding everybody always to live in balance, to respect the harmony. The society does however except the role of a professional counselor, one who understands psychology and emotional psychology, who fulfills the role within the society of healing trauma.

The cycle is: those abused by narcissist develop narcissistic tendencies which are then exploited by the narcissists. Narcissism is a reflex personality, growing from a traumatic experience. There are covert and overt narcissists. When it replaces a persons authentic and original personality it becomes a social problem for the community. There are varying levels of narcissism, and there are many energy exploitation strategies although they do typically conform to only a handful of types. 

As always, projection of an analysis on to the situation for the purpose of path-working and healing, must integrate that there may be other invisible factors or other systems of analysis which are more accurate to individual cases. 

Despite being the best tool we have, ‘the versus narcissism technique’ context based on identifying shame-reflex, is limited; it involves extremism and fundamentalism, left-brain thinking which narcissists epitomize as reptilian calculus and which are useful in making sense of the world for people who have been emotionally and mentally destabilized by involvement with narcissists. 

Remember, the narcissists favorite trick is to go public about how their victim has been narcissistically abusing them, as soon as the victim recognizes that they are being victimized. The narcissist will become aware their victim is waking up to them even before the victim does. They are usually gone and involving themselves in support groups, blackening the victims name, even before the victim in the mess of a breakdown fully realizes what has just happened to them.

“She needs to hear somebody say, I am sorry. And for her to believe it to accept it.”

This can be very difficult for narcissist who primarily does not want to confront their own shame, to the extent of deleting it entirely from their being. They have invested a lot of time in the personality and behavioral routines which have emerged as a result of not facing that shame. The amount of emotion and empathic ability a narcissist deletes is what places them where they are on the spectrum. 

Narcissists have problem with authenticity. Narcissists reject, resent, hate, and persecute, genuine authenticity, wholesomeness, the integrity to do the right thing. They are experts at the face value act of “being seen to be doing the right thing” for their own public image and supply-reward system. The difficulty in helping an assist through the healing process is that they will not accept authenticity because they do not/cannot resonate with it at all. 

Therefore, were a person who abused the narcissist as a child, to step into the room and say “I am so sorry for what I did, and I mean it”; the narcissist would not accept that as a reality. 

The structure of their being relies on multiple supply/support , a structure of orientation which dissolves as soon as they accept “I’m sorry”.  For them to be able to progress is normal people, they need to hear those words from somebody who they can accept it from, which is unlikely to be the original abuser.

Another major factor under recognition is narcissists have a heightened sense of expectancy, so what they perceive to be an abuse toward them is in many cases, the failing of the world in general to meet their higher than reasonable expectancy. 

That “daddy did not buy her a pony for Christmas” has triggered her lifelong antisocial behavior personality, is interpreted by her as being an abuse because she cannot accept with the child’s mind which narcissists operate from regardless of actual age. Instead it is interpreted as willful and malignant nastiness inflicted upon her by somebody who was supposed to support her but let her down; this becomes the model for the concept of ‘love’ which she will repeat in various forms with every relationship she has. 

She will only level out and stabilize in her behavior when she has to maintain public image in the eyes of society, usually only when she has achieved that superiority status of her world being put to right, that she feels settled now. For her to be able to attain that, she needs to persecute somebody is who she has dehumanized not only in her own mind but in the community around them. 

Narcissist require victims and they will invent them to achieve their goal. Others recognize that goal as grandiosity, superiority, dehumanization of others, while those who believe the paradigm created by the narcissist, along with a narcissist who projects it, recognize it to be accepted and normal. 

It is normal that everybody should have a pony for Christmas, everybody has a pony for Christmas, there is something wrong with people who don’t. The narcissist is clever. It is not actually a pony for Christmas which is the topic here, they call it the feeling of safety and that target who was woken up to them, they call a threat. 

Thus, when the narcissist leaves a relationship in which they have exploited behind closed doors that partner, the narcissist says that the person is a danger and has abused her. 

On her say-so, her victim is prosecuted for domestic abuse and gains a bad reputation by her supply network, which is an extended abuse network who do not even know him, simply to satisfy her need to appear to be a normal person in the community. What she has achieved by this is to maximize her yield of support/supply. She can get more energy from 10 or 20 people looking after her occasionally, then she can get from one person who has exclusively dedicated himself to that. 

For many men entering into relationships, this is the situation they are facing. Men are sacrificed to this cause all the time in the name of feminism. It is why the phrase ‘feminism is cancer’ has been coined by those who are aware of what is happening to our communities. 

The “Internet cult of narcissism” is 5th Wave feminism using social media to indoctrinate the general female culture with a blueprint strategy of divide-and-control. 

Female supremacy is domestic terrorism. It recruits vulnerable members of society to become its agents. It recruits female narcissist to become its agents. It blurs the line between those two agencies.

The role of men in the community is not to reinforce the ‘divide and control’ by avoiding all females, which is the MGTOW rhetoric. Historically, men are designed to physically, emotionally and mentally to be protectors. 

At this time in history, men’s best way of protecting everybody is to identify the enemy is an extremist philosophy which is brainwashing women against men. 

Somehow, men have got to get women to see that is what’s happening and for women to decide that in a world out of balance, the only way any of us can attain balance is by working together for the harmony, doing so knowledgeably. That genders are not ‘opposite’ but in fact are ‘complementary’. We are physically, mentally, emotionally designed for union and when we do so, divine pleasure results. 

The man is not trying to abuse her by deconditioning her away from a cult which is designed to destroy relationships and communities. He’s trying to protect her from it and from her own destructive, negative tendencies. 

If feminism was worthy of being accepted, it would be teaching women how better to get on with men; not how to exploit and punish them for not being women. 

For women to learn how better to get on with men, open communication with men who are of their own mind is preferable than projecting strawman arguments at them. 

BitchPack

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gY1NOFwi98k&t=6671s

"If and when you feel rage, if you would only give yourself some time, some spiritual food, if you will do that for yourself, if you will abridge your rage with that spiritual food, eventually everything will calm down and will be fine. You will be able to move ahead and that time of rage will be over. The idea of forgiveness. Womens rage often comes from their family of origin situation, sometimes it comes from adult trauma too, that is less common. For instance a woman who has had a mate who has been tremendously abusive. That is less common because usually people who have not abused as children will not stay for a minute with a mate who abuses them. So the adult trauma is less common. Regardless of where the trauma ocurs, something has to happen, to recognise, it, to bless it, to contain it and to leave it."  Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Women Who Run With The Wolves

Blame Shifting.
Often the ones perusading you to leave the perceived abuser (the target), are abusers who do not want to let you go (the cult, who extrapolate your energy). Often the target is a liberator who the peer group resent.

She doesn't know what to do. So she will do whatever the next person she speaks with who she trusts tells her to do. That is how she is. Manipulable. So, I told her to ignore everyone else and trust her own intuition. Everybody else in her life is giving her various versions of ignore me and avoid me. Because I am a threat to their control over her. They are all caught in energy games. As an outsider-observer I can see this clearly for what it is. Because she is coming from a culture of control-games, that is normal to her, she will entangle me in them too if she has a chance to. I prefer to keep my life clean. I trust my own intuition. It helps more than other peoples advice ever does.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LLH4qIpThfM&feature=youtu.be

"The activation of the higher brain centers." 

Ishtar Babilu Dingir

See also:

Energy Games
StoneWall

AuthorityAbuse

Ohm&Holo-3

pre-amble

The following is more scattered 'wings in flight' than the focus of the original opening which has emerged during the telling. A collection of collections collectively a whole and expressing, explaining more than the sum of its parts. Most of this was written at a time where the flow was so strong the memor I have of writing it is the memory of watching myself as some other force took hold of my body to bring through the words which during copy-typing I now read as if for the first time. I sincerely believe this has to do with proximity and approach to the Ogham event of Saint Davids Day in Wales this year with its powerful energies.

Ohm & Holo - Part Three

Usually "as a creative" my 2nd Attention (Don Carlos) is more powerful and compelling than my 1st Attention (immediate). "inner sight" is the connectivity to others who we are energetically linked to.

When people call me 'egotist' it is annoying, not because of receiving it as an insult but because they are not accurately perceiving and making a bad judgement call.

I do question this, a lot, are they right? Should I check my ego? Most fo the time it is because to call someone egotistic is a control game used to demean them, and not an accurate description. People do not even know what 'ego' properly means, what it is. 

Ego inhibits clarity of perception and connection to higher functioning. People who have zero access to higher funcitoning and do not even know or experience perception from there, are evidently much more egoic than I am. That I am writing knowledgeably about experiences which can not be expeirenced if a person is controlled by ego is the proof of that. It is not "me" it is about the experiences and perceptions, which fascinate me so much to be scribing them so that others can read it and share a common affinity with the knowledge base. I have no interest in showing off about this stuff for personal glory. Simply this is how different life is for shamen. 

We need ego to make accurate judgement call and to orient in 1st Attention reality.

I have overcome / detached from it enough not to be bound to it - this is necessary for Second Attention. 

"How many times do you step back form it?" Dean Du Feau (on 3rd & etc)

Is that map even right? 

2nd Attention includes and evolves

ESP

Telepathy

Psychic

Inner Connectivity with others,

elsewhere and elsewhen

'It's like Bluetooth'

"Oh, you are a writer!" she wrote, and promptly blocked me. In the duality of 'is it a joke' or 'her genuine social belief from some schizotypal idiom', I saw that she is a Player and psychotic. It took 6 months for me to clearly see that.

Writing is a Gift

for other people, and although gifted a writer is also cursed with a double-first Attention.

Writing is a Gate to Second Attention perception. 

Words are feather. They have no weight. A book is wings. 

"Nothing is ever finished" Pete Robinson, Risca School of Art

I do not complete it because I prefer not to shut the gate and set into stone that which is by its nature ephemeral, a living flow. 

It comes to life in a readers mind. 

"Imagination is not Imaginary." OGD (Matthers)

The change is - criticism does not break me now I have learned to scorn it, detached I am free of its chains and bonds to its dogma. This is her teaching, that which I have learned from her attitude. 

People think of "the 1% Elite" in terms of material wealth. Because peope are greedy and in poverty. People do not think of "the 1% elite" in terms of Spirituality. When they meet them: the same Hate. 

People cannot accept the acceleration curve of spiritual development can be attained with guidance from mystery schools. They are taught to reject it as cult and persecute the adept as crazy simply because culturally conditioned people perceive differently to the way spiritual adepts perceive.

Convenience wins unless it is ego or Love. When it is Love and faith so deep to build an ego around it, a potent force. If reciprocated, dedication. If rejected, obsession. 

The Ascent and sub-stantiation materialisation (body forms) and dematerialization (spirit ascends) that means it transcends substance.

sub : less than
stan - dard (of the level)

stance : to posit

Na-Ga to bring of or into the earth (geo) (substantiation) - serpent naga

Our souls were brought here through repilian birthing (dna) but not ALL souls - only this genotype which 'drank of the manna of the serpent gods' ("the vine" as metaphoric) / breathed of their vapour - the World Snake, Life Cult. Not All Life forms have reptilian cortex in their brain for specific self-awareness 

Ba - La - N - Chi 

('chep' is old Anglo-Saxon for 'trade' it literally means 'market' and is root of the word 'cheap')

internal BALANCE external
and
Judgement (maat)

cognitive development 

(ate from tree of Knowledge)

The Ascent was not literal 'levitating into the sky' it was dematerialization, from Earth (ge) to [WhiteZone] (death). Mayan Shamanism. Christed consciousness. 

Iesus example is an OBE (outer body experience) which many people have achieved, often purposefully, through use of shamanic plant spirit allies (herbs). 

When you know Truth you understand how christianity is a mutated version of that truth, it all fits into place. What Iesus was attempting to teach.

The Adonai is the 'elevated form of messiah' but what does that mean? 

Personality is grid of ST on each saints day, the grid conforms to that lucidity. 

5 into 4

S A into > it is AsYr
(As Is)

'curse of the azzur bonds'

an ancient grid we so caught in, our language structure itself reinforces that on levels fo cognition below (substrata) awareness. All language we speak retain the same codex. Being aware of it is seeing the code.

Americanadian Indians were taught xeno-linguistics to compare - most of that has knowledge base died off within the very recent past and living generations after thousands of generations of maintaining it. 

The Flood, Noah. Electrical. Electrolysis to stone. MUDFOSSILS. It happened. The Drowning. The waters receded. The New Earth. 

The reciprocal argument of "it is non-sense because non'sense says so."

90% of my living generation (40 years either side) do not have the cognitive faculty to recognize their own super-ego conditioning is blinding them. They call it 'normal' but it is non-sense. 

_____________________

Pure, ancient words and word-blocks. Etymology. The constant concepts hidden in mutated contexts, of cultures and cultural conditioning.

_____________________

Consisting of 

an excerpt from the 

almanac 

Auriglyphica 

of 

snake apple tree

______________________

OHM AND HOLO

PART ONE

PART TWO

PART THREE

related:

ASYR

RE

THE BUBBLE

______________________

Ohm&Holo-2

Ogham & Holo - Part Two

pre-amble

The sub-titles used here are a quick-reference memetic for self to associate the concepts further explored below in note form. The effort required to copy-type them means they become 'the bulk core thing itself' because further elaboration takes a lot longer literally years. 

Psilocybin and Telepathy, for the Percept of Holograms
and
Cats and Toxoplasma Gondii

both headings/sets of topics for Hive Minds

Coming toward the center of the Ogham (Aum) through and from which the gridding flows, lucid awareness of telepathic focus and lack of it in the souls around me. I am not seeing the bodies i am seeing those in resonance with, open hearts attuned with this flowing. The energy of Saint David and the grid of his Path toward Source and all the awareness involved. The Mind of the Saint seizing those whose hearts are somehow connected with it. Our children are singing songs of his dedication in the old language. As a part of this energetic circuit it is inevitable to be affected by it.

"She has a feline face" is because her cats project an energy field onto her. They are in an energetic relationship.

Overlays. I do not always see the form which energy configurations hold water hold facial muscle into / as. * sometimes i witness the fragmented, of unsettled layers.

Writing these words i was in split attention, configuring my inner vision and connectivity to the grid. Thus the words were specific block prints.                

They project their (hologrid/holofield) hologram onto the target.
The Attention is the projector.

I feel it on myself also when 4th dimensional "minds" are holding me, gripping me, gridding me to their vision. Assertive yang. I usually reject it because I prefer flowing yin. When I accept it, i walk that path, energetic attachments are like hook and line puppet strings steering us onward, by far most of them are greed based and it unsettles me. Accepting and forgiving and letting them go.

Cats teach us about this and other things because they are psychic creatures. It is why we worshipped them in Egypt. Their cognition is different to ours, they know about how consciousness can be realigned depending on who else is around and how energy fields affect multiple individuals at once to cause us to live through events, because of how energy works. Ge is a word for this, geo, associated with the anal muscle because that is where the shit comes out, that is where earth is made.

*multiple levels of teaching and perception. The phrasing of these notes, at the time when written was vague, in retrospect it is to permit an alternate teaching from second attention, the same words trigger secondary awareness. The hieroglyphs are written to do this but most scholars do not know about second attention because they forget Egyptian priests are shaman with different and expanded mental faculty, developed by methods showed in the stellae such as use of plant spirit allies.

On this occasion the phrase explaining 'being held into / as' indicates why it is called AsYr (modern: Assyria). Azzur, "As"-re (it emanates from here where the grid is held).

The study if this with Saint David within Christianity is to explore the study of how the language and mental grids we use (attain and or deviate from) were established long ago when our species mental form for cognitive development was set. Sound affects dna. Sound effects perceptions. Frog sperms become lizards in their eggs when specific sounds are played at them during fetal development. Human cognition is the same. Sound is the attunement.

Following this we study the waveforms of the long count and solar radiation. This is why we call the deity Re, the ray from the source. She holds that specific tonal harmonic and by dedicating to her, becoming energetically aligned to her, we channel that harmonic. St David is a different configuration stable around the same core. All cores of Ra, God, Source, Purity ( of being and of perception), whatever you call it. 'Allah' means "the whole" (al start, all) (la emanation, ley, the line of sight, the central balance of the oscillation) which is both the same as the Source but also indicates the macrocosm including all things, a different position of reference. This is why we need so many words and to know and agreed precisely what they mean, not using one word to mean another. 

______________________

OHM AND HOLO

PART ONE

PART TWO

PART THREE

related:

ASYR

RE

THE BUBBLE

______________________

Ohm&Holo-1

pre-amble 

I meditate, contemplate and turn it around until the awakening revelation occurs, wisdom from experience and knowing the underlaying theme of our tale, the brickwork and girder structure through which our experiences flow. We assume we are pioneering a new thing and that it is madness to talk of repeating the same, repeating the same, lifetime after lifetime because we are walking on ripples of original events so long ago. 

Yet entering the gridding of powerful events, cosmic alignments, the pulse of life shows clearly that this is so. As it happens my mind whirls with words. Sometimes the words flood my attention so powerfully they have to be written down. In town I rapidly bought a pad and pen set, sat on a bench and scrawled until my mind was free and i could go about my business. 

This is a transcript from the pocket notepad. These are the observations, revelations, from Saint Davids Day where groups celebrated the energy of a Sainted Being by performing, the brass music of a religious band in its reverence has holy resonance.

Ogham & Holo - Part One

When we judge from cultural conditioning, we get it wrong.

Instinct and purity if the soul is the only true reasoning.
Especially in matters of the heart.

Society is a mess because of this. Religions form to set peoples objectivity straight and they soon become part of the problem. Even Buddhism got sidetracked, necessarily for it has so kuch to teach which requires multiple lifetimes to assimilate. The ability to awaken transmigrated consciousness, the awakening of that, the memory of previous knowledges, the purpose of what to do with the holistic singularity which you are at this time, the hostility if a world which has no such insights due to toxic distraction, the objectivity if cleansing that or avoiding it to progress. Accepting we cannot change it all because so much is beyond our scope. Focus on what we can do which is sacred because it is divine.

The progression toward sainthood means living a specific way, the opening of the heart to sense and love all things. To accept and to forgive all things so as not to be caught and twisted into their  scheme. It is a liberation and this is step by step planetary liberation. The original intention.

The teachings are transmitted by energetic imprint, harmonies with the flow of them.

Achieving and maintaining clarity of focus. 

1 cultural conditioning is agenda based reasoning and does not build lasting stability because it is not truth.

The truth of a thing. The shape of its nature. Recognizing it (and if necessary thwarting its control of us by detaching, to avoid distraction, to flow purely in ascent).

Even in  the language we use to describe it.

Re - cognize

Is that to re-interpret or Re the Egyptian (Asyr- Ba'bEl-) deified concept of 'the radiant / ray from Source' - as intended.

We could all have a more fun life and a more stable community by deconditioning from:

EXPECTED CONFORMITY TO SOCIAL PREJUDICE

Disclaimer Regarding Sources of Concepts Assimilated and Integrity of Purpose:

Against the accusation of a mish-mash of different spiritual beliefs. I have studied intently sufficient to know what is what. I use the terms for the concepts most easy to make holistic sense of in relation to living experiences. A patchwork view after the dissolution at Babel.

______________________

OHM AND HOLO

PART ONE

PART TWO

PART THREE

related:

ASYR

RE

THE BUBBLE

______________________

0.714

A = 365 / 7 = 52~
B = 360 / 7 = 51~ 

A - B =      0.7142861    degree’s of a circle   = 5 days  =  120 hours

Mathematical associations with Venus (Ishtar) the Morning Star.

Celtic mythology associates this with the five days out of time, a pentacle, measured in pagan britain by the lighting of autumnal fires on halloween and bonfire night, representing connection with the spirit world and the death of totalitarian rule, respectively; a desire for self-rule so that we may pursue spiritualism unhindered, and the extent to which it takes and leads us, and how this is such a different way of being than the totalitarian can permit to be lived openly, thus the need for secret folk religions and secret societies whose truing surmount to the same thing; human evolution.

0.7142861

40 hour working week in britain. 5 days and then you can have two days to rest. The numbers gridding us into a set rhythmic cycle which detaches us from organic natural connection with the galactic cycles. We are forced outside of the comfort zone by exploitation games played by powerful governors and those who play the governors. But for why?

I have been accused of starting a Cult. I intend to do no such thing. My marketing strategy is something which helps verify the reality of the mystical quality of my writings. It is upon this which people fear a cult may be founded.

I am a Shaman. I am a historic researcher specialising in the progress of Humanity since the last massive scale world war which threw us all back to the stone-age, and the remnants of the 'war of/on hate’ permeate to this day through human societies.

Evidence of the global annihilation war and our rise since then. The deserts were placed by technologies we do not have any more, on top of the site of thermonuclear devices, which fused the earth into a type of glass we have only reproduced by nuclear bomb testing. That every great desert has this type of high fusion glass beneath it, the stuff of legends because it contains A Great Truth of our human experience and situation, and the current global background radiation, are having an affect on our evolution.
We "Do or we Do Not do. There is no Try.” Master Yoda

Humans are attempting to overcome self-deafer. One method is development of a detachment from emotions, another is detachment from mind, another is detachment from self. There are perhaps others. All paths (nihilism, spirituality, religion, confusion, other) are aspects of these core paths; angels gridding infrastructure.*

The other path is to Observe and collate observed data. Spiritist experience it as a reality and the multi-cultural resource and knowledge base verifies lived experiences. Such data is the realm of shamanism, whatever other dimensions are being
Science predominates and is the domain only if the material dimension. It advances because of warfare and the war economy which revolves around the gambling operation of usury based money. Non-usury based monetary systems do not fund war sciences which computers, light-bulbs and heart-monitor machines in hospitals are an extension of.
We need All of this and so far we are not ready as a species to let go entirely of one aspect of it so as to focus on the others. Within the 3d pentacle of the bandwidth all of the above exists in, are humans progressing steadily and developing a deepening comprehension of What Is Life.

Such example of my writing, a personal understanding of the world view,  gives you an example of why people accuse me of trying to start a cult. You read it, you enjoyed it, you could see where I was coming from, and you could see that these and similar ideas developed further would be accessible through more of my writing, or if not me then similar writers. Being a writer and a spirit medium, other writers ghost write through me. This is a secret of Thoth, the Scribe, and living that through many generations as a way of life, I have got to this stage, to enjoy the demonic machines the medieval scryers foretold humans would become enslaved to.
It is a double edged sword and I thank the people who accuse me of trying to start a cult, for giving me a self-promotion tip. Now give me a dollar.


*multi-dimensional math machine deities controlling humans; archons

snakeappletree is a moniker that was given me by an egyptian scribe who wrote my name in hieroglyphs. I studied egyptology a lot and made my own translations, understood that shamen wrote this and I understood what they were doing. I studied their teachings. I followed the roots of their tradition to Assyria, its mutation into Babylon (Alpha Beta); Egypt being letter E is the 5th therefore the pentacle civilisation, and it still exists today. The studies of the priesthoods teachings taught me who I am. My own mathematical Archonic harmonic. I studied resonance with music machines and crystals for the light-body / water-body interaction. I discovered how harmonics resonate through time and space because self-balanced, self harmonic entities vibrate freely, and chime. My chime is snake apple tree this moniker impacts on the pre-programmed, ready to be exploited, popular mindset because these symbols are deeply embedded into the psyche and people respond t them exactly how they have been programmed to respond to them by people who know what they are doing much more than most people. To recognise that this is happening is an intelligence test. Writing about it makes these writings dangerous. Especially within the context of evolution and social cultures being engineered by key individuals exploiting systems which humans are enslaved to so as to play this game upon them.

I can read the symbols. I am a scribe. I remember back through the incarnations to many experiences and by resonance I connect with others on the harmonic so as to witness, remember, and connect with the aware minds as a telepathic bond, to all of those who through many lifetimes I have connected. I sound like an arrogant god to write this, but the egyptian priests, the sorcerer kings, the far seers, the pharaoh, were always accused of being arrogant gods. I am of a bloodline noted for its abilities and its connection with archons. We all are and we are all becoming interbred which is a good thing although we are all, also, trying to maintain a purity of pure forms, because we do not want to lose the abilities humans carry in our genes which some day will become more important to human evolutionary development when the time is right for them to flower. Some families have done this for thousands of generations, some are emerging from the weave of potentials in the

A book was started to map the development of some of these families, it is an important book with multiple religions based around it. Bible, (the Beta version obviously survived and intended for Babylon), the C version (Constantinople, constant in the people, the con-job, the ), the Q’ran, (‘whole cauldron Way [Entering] ‘ of Ra manifest-of-earth’) There are hidden teachings in language which take a scribe to translate, an educated member of the priesthood.

I traced the priesthoods influence on south american civilisations, the development of the priesthood in its new form until the rigidity of its stepped focus drew its polarity the reptilian chaos which took grip of its society, and it fell. The next generation of genuine spirituals walked away from it entirely. Next the remnants of the teaching spread into the north americas where they influenced the north american / canadian indian cultures. There is also that China follows the same patterns, uses the same symbols, connects with it.

There is archaeological evidence of everything I have written here. This is verifiable. As a writer and a dad I do not have time to retrieve bookmarked links and add them to an appendix, which as a professional historian I would be expected to. All of the data i available. What is not, are the notes i have made tracing my studies into my understanding as a member of the priesthood. I have written about that on blogs.

What I discovered is a version of history and the multi-cultural symbols relating to the important information which has survived history through many destructive wars. The teachings of those groups connect with European masonry and teaching schools as much as russian and european and scandanavian tribal groups prior to christianity destroying much of the knowledge base. The knowledge base is retrievable by reliving memory of it through past life, which requires teachings, which have been sacred or secret teachings because people are afraid of that which they are not yet ready to understand. History has a lesson of killing its socrates and healers, its zero chiefs and far seers. the moniker snakeappletree has been hooked into that.

I am a light healer and I have studied with the best. snake means healer, it means energy wave; it is what i am made of, my specialism. It is music, it is light, it is smiling hearts synaesthetically seen from taking sacred spirit guides, allies, to help my personal development, shamanic healing tools mushrooms and saliva, which are illegal in cultures which repress evolution, repress shamanism, repress human development and the growth of a shamanic global culture networking and rising humanity above the control grip of the evil archons who are gridding us into their control games through structured governmental systems and military policing leading to war.  The beast on Ishtar’s leash.

This is not a cult and it is not a secret society. It is publicly accessible and its purpose is good; to decondition people, to educate people, to explore ideas, to discuss my research as an historian, to study being a scribe, and related topics. 

I am also networking as a businessman attempting to survive the collapsing British economy, and a human reaching out hoping for similar people to connect with. I represent a lot of cultural groups with what I am doing, most of whom I have not mentioned here. 

UnicornHuntersE4

Preface
Chapter One  Chapter Two  Chapter Three  Chapter Four  Chapter Five  Chapter Six  Chapter Seven   
The Unicorn Hunters

Chapter Four

Meadow tames me with spring softness into an autumn comfort. Directs my skills to positivity. I need her. I cannot tell you who or how many who's i have been used against my will to kill by remote. I cannot tell you what other depravity I was involved in. When i began healing instead of harming, as my will and awareness grew stronger, when i began riding higher and with more positive light, the back of my heart erupted with light and i began to become invisible to the ones who were stealing me from my sleep and forcing dreamings upon me. These dreamings are not fantasy, they are really real in the really real real. It is far outside the bounds of Mental Health textbooks, what officially is known about it is classified military secrets. Meadow taught me a white light meditation, filling myself with white light as i breathe until my body glows with it. Inner tranquility.

Meadow is not on mental health henefits as she has avoided the system entirely throughout her whole life. For most of it she has lived in forests, on traveler sites, squats and her friends council houses, all across the country. What she needs comes to her and she goes where she is needed. She embodies freedom. Her journey has brought her to this place.

The garden centre has a converted barn extended by a corrugated metal shelter which we all hate despite it being useful, providing an outdoor place to sit in the dry and stare through the few plants left by its previous owners at the trees behind it from the road. After a few days here we had re-oriented our center away from coming in, into looking out. We discussed sky-places from where we project down our understanding of the place from the air, and decided to meet there tonight during dream.

My skill at astral travel, remote viewing and an ability to connect with others, riding hosts, to have persuasive powers as a voice in their head which many mistake for their own mind to be doing the talking because they cannot see; all this is why my role as facilitator. My focus. Its inner systems. Meadows gentleness takes us through into the dimensions we want to go. Her emotion. Its inner symbolism. Jake boosts my scope, we work together, with his ability to connect with frequencies which he hears as sounds. His harmony. Its rhythms. The music of our souls.

"When the others arrive shall we have a pentacle." Expresses Meadow. Her voice speaks the words not as a question, she talks backwards like that "from cider and origin." It sounds or feels like she says, festival rather than pentacle. She speaks on many levels and challenges us to accept. This is our riddle game. We all play it endlessly. What makes us the shamen is that we do so knowingly. Meadow most of all.

That night we dreamed intensely.

It took us a while to orientate; i was stuck in the forest until i remembered, upward! Meadow down by the river tho to her it appeared as a stream. Jake swooped in and two others, spirit guides or other travelers, perhaps but we don't like to think about that the shadow ones, lost guides turned nasty. We could all feel them and in the minds eye perhaps see them. United we function as one eye, usually we need time to orientate. We have done this a few times before but only once so powerfully, when we brought along the unicorn and vision-made this place into being. We do not all see each others spirit guides, though they are not always presenting themselves visibly anyway.

The presence of others took its effect as we mingled and accepted our relationship with the others at deeper soul level of understanding than is easy to write about in words. We settled into each other by making peace, sharing understanding, feeling their chakras insert into our own and adapting to the balance. In the balance often barter. Their powers became ours for the journey.

We flew over our landscape, seeing the ruins, a column of white so bright we could not look toward it, the stone circle, the spring. Fields and forests. Dreamers more conscious than human sleepers, animals in their burrows and nests, involved in their own Dreamings.

We saw deadlands beyond where industry, concrete and gaseous metal had closed areas off of the dream. We felt starlight like water upon us. We waited until the density above our heads had lifted, so we may rise. Waiting at the Gate until accepted, a natural sign will alert you to the opening of the second gate. To go through the first is to bring dust of your journeys with you. To go through the second is to enter cleansed that you may see the next crossing more purely as it truly is. A lighter frequency. And then to the next gate. A gate is a moment expanded through time. It can be depicted through symbol. We share common symbols, between us have a repertoire sufficient to deal with most crossings.

An awareness flows through us; it is because we said hello to the stones. The word for stones is also light. Crystal, but the emanation for which crystal is a conduit. It affects the light grid through which particles filter with such high refinement that sleepers cannot see it, only dreamers and the dead, and those of other realms who share this space for their passage or their home.

From the higher perception we did our work. When we awoke on a different wave of consciousness the next mid-late morning, we remembered as much as we can of it. Jake made voice recording, I wrote in my dream diary and Meadow told us what she had seen. We shared our information and extrapolated what we must do now. We had our mission for the time of us being here, tasks we must perform. It all works for the balance so that the paths of our lives and those around us can continue toward the highest frequencies possible. Gradually through centuries we are working toward a state of attaining higher and higher frequencies. This is the Ascent and it affects our consciousness. We awaken.

Except that night, for that dreaming, it did not go like that. The strangers were together, one like us a unicorn hunter and its spirit ally, although one could as easily call it the other way around, a spirit and the human with whom it travels. Often, so often it is human sleepers who are bound by spirits of the Otherworlds, we see this regularly.

The unicorn hunter was not from our time although in the astral and especially so close to a shrine, matters of time ceased to matter. We learn an alternate system of physics. Spirit sciences. Time is mass and mass is time. In the realm of conscious dreaming it is the self who creates an ephemeral version of mass, it is our lucidity and focus by which we create time. Our group enhances this, our balance unique and its own flow. The unicorn hunter and his ally were harmonic to our own flow, by desire.

He was excited to meet us. I visualized him as a short fat man dressed in steampunk attire, leather straps and breeches. His ally was deflecting the shrine light from behind him so that he did not cast a shadow, by this he was difficult to read, to know, to see. His presence was strong and assertive, we did not shift or scatter, we held with him. It felt important to do so.

Around the shrine, countless other dimensions shifted, a spine of kaliedescopic spokes rotating, through which energy rises. As other energy threads flow around the core, gates open through which other dreamers find their levels.

"How did you find us?"

"Unicorn."

We knew this meant it wants rescuing, obviously another unicorn hunter would have some sort of ability to hear its call for help, he would after all have been listening for such things.

His gesture, interpret that however you will, the symbol image of a ghostly smokey unicorn head in the space between us momentarily at chest height, his desire to capture one revealing his quest and beyond that his true nature, murderous black of his eyes, sureness of such volume and gravity it made dense of the particles around us, held up only by the hope of his aspiration.

We were at once accused, revered, and requested that he may invite himself upon us, through us to meet our unicorn, a wild power which we had enslaved for our mastery. The dreaming unicorn swept up through us.

"Who is this guy?"

His power was immense. He released the unicorn from our bond, using our guilt reaction and pride as a lever. Had he intended to do so was irrelevant; the will of the unicorn was far beyond ours. We were swept up with it. I felt Meadow beside me gripping it by its mane. Jake gripping its tail. Something dark flew up past us, travelling faster than the unicorn only by a degree and within its flow. The elation of that freedom and the fierce drive of the unicorns desire to escape its tether and run fast and far, we felt that too in its entirety. As the unicorn shed its attachments to that place, it shed us, as a snake sheds its skin. It shed us so powerfully that we also shed ourselves. And yet we fripped, sending one another bursts of energy to strengthen our bond. If one of us had fallen, we all would. It was a challenge we did not intend to face.

The unicorn slowed.

The spirit ally of our encounter was now projecting a shield to shadow all three of us from the awareness of the unicorn. It did not know we were there! It was relaxing, we all were. Shaking its mane and trodding its new ground. Its heart hardwired to its brain and beyond, it had gone home to a safe place. Around us... green haven.

We had to be quiet incase the unicorn heard us thinking. We knew that we had to capture the unicorn again: in case we got stuck here, even if not for our original purpose. And then the scene changed.

We were in a large luxury stable. The colours of the stable are the same as those on the ring which the cunning spirit ally had placed over the unicorns horn; a tether! Brown, tan and silver. The steampunk guy was waiting for us.

We were exhilarated, we met him with laughter despite we acknowledged him as thief.

"There are those who would not go to the liberty of preserving the animal; taking simply the tusk. Cutting it off. Killing the beast."

We climbed off the unicorn. It was standing still, listening, observing. Its heart flared out in reach to analyze the surroundings. Its tusk flared out for same purpose and to project its will into the particles from which the realm was constructed, to re-shape them. The projection failed, they remained as they were.

"It is a strong chain. Specially made."

He would have attacked us if he were hostile. He was confident. A thief bothering to open up conversation with the people from whom he had stolen, directly following the theft.

"Yet truly, the unicorn is not yours to keep. It having become property is now appropriated. Thus sealing the bond upon it. It escaped from you, its first gate. There are three with your binding and this is the second. It binds you also into its service. In course, I shall no longer be its master. What I do is a necessity, and a consequence of the path which yourselves started."

"Who are you?"

"You still seek to possess it. You have done your bit and may do so again in the full circle of time. This is the bind I have worked into my... it's tether. Already you have learned much, already you are experts at this chase. Welcome. There are some of us who have been doing this for some time."

"Are you Victorian?"

"We should find the third. The unicorn knows already what must befall it and what path it will shape."

The unicorn was looking pissed off.

"Worry not, we are a step closer toward capturing a unicorn."

"We had already caught it." Sarcastically.

"No, indeed you have not. There are planes and depths you do not know of, places where unicorns go, we can barely imagine."

"Where are we?"

"Within the ring, of course."

"What will you do with it?"

He smiled.

Back in the normal world:

"I can't believe we lost a fucking unicorn."


continues at: Chapter Five

UnicornHuntersE3

Preface
Chapter One  Chapter Two  Chapter Three  Chapter Four  Chapter Five  Chapter Six  Chapter Seven   

The Unicorn Hunters

 

Chapter Three

"Marlen bach, ke be mennid u wal?"
Translation: Merlin boy, can you be mending the wall?

Authors note; i am no expert in the tongue of ancient Britons. This is purely atmospheric purposes.

Merlin was fed up. He could feel and at times even see through the eyes of another Merlin, one yet to come. He was unsure was it himself in the future, perhaps his next life, with whom he had this strange connection. It had become an obsession for him, strengthening his understanding of what was happening with him, and finding out why nobody else around him was experiencing life this way. They called it his madness, at times such as he tried to describe it. He had learned not to.

His father and mother did not understand it, feared it. He had ran away and lived five seasons alone in the deep woods, a time during which his ability enhanced. Though he studied with the wise whenever he could, to such extent they were talking of sending him to the white monks except for the work needed doing here, even his idle hands were better than none; becoming a man of learning in their foreign culture seemed impossible and felt wrong somehow, deep within him where the dark guide dwells. He spoke with it, it came to him in dreams. He knew the imagery and memories to be those of living another life in another age. Carved stone coming to life through forms at once both pictorial and writing. Merlin had ambitions to construct of wood as his peoples tradition similar symbols. The elders directed him toward the tree script and stories of his own culture, should in education he find a way to explain his sight. Were it ever useful to his people would have been another matter.

They told him tales of the crone who died a generation ago near here. Merlin spoke with her also and surprised them by 'just simply knowing' the hidden meanings of the stories she had told them, which were passed on verbally; stories which enchanted and inspired the tribes. Merlin read the stories for their wisdom and he taught others. Soon reputation his madness was replaced by acceptance of his intelligence. He was sent as envoy of his people to the local lords castle, to learn and to work, to find his way onto the nobles council. He was sent on missions as a spy and a messenger.

Merlin knew that he was connecting with souls, some his own and others who were around him now and yet sleeping, sleeping because in their dream they had work to do, work which took lifetimes to accomplish. Unifying all of the tribes to end war and begin progress so as to improve the human condition. He saw the patterns of life changing all through the ages and he recalled its long-sighted lessons in times of his peoples need.

This is how we remember him.

This chapter of the story is for Paul, who taught me around a stone circle at the turn of the millennium, a festival attended by thousands of people and not all of them sleepers; the Celtic battle dress of war against the oppressor, purple combat trousers and a hooded shaman top. Who told me the mental health services had classified him as schizophrenic for believing himself to be Merlin. He explained to me how he had connected with the Merlin energy, so much of the ancient ways made perfect sense to him. Who showed me the oldest standing stone in the city, placed long ago before romans came. The stone was crystal, some weathered gray type of granite containing large chunks of volcanically created quartz. A piece of the heart of the earth. We placed our hands on it.

This was one of my initiatory rites into Druidry, it happened because the Great Spirit guided us. What amazed me about Paul is he seemed to have stepped outside of being a man with concerns of a man and was walking the path of myth, it was holy energy. A different fire burned in his eyes, starlight pure and kind. He transmitted information by the pace of his breath controlling the level of his heart, my heart received and the brain converted it to memory and knowledge. I transceived all the workings of a man puzzling all of this out and crossing over into a world beyond todays society. Chance meetings born of destiny.

Where he had began to remember, I began to remember. Once having seen, shared, experienced, merged with other selves in other times and places, integrated that picture as a continuum. One can never go back. Modern society has no concept of integrity.

The legend says Merlin was born backwards in time.

The next fifteen years were visits from future selves, stemming back because I was reaching forward with such clarity of focus. I was diagnosed as schizophrenic by mental health services of the same instructions manual and put onto long-term sickness benefits. Several years later they adjusted it to more accurate, schizotypal disorder. Reclusive due to traumatic experiences, inability to retain close personal friendships, possibly belief in fictional versions of reality, typically sensory hallucinations in extreme cases - the classic 'hearing voices'.

When was the last time you heard a voice? When was the last time you listened? When did you last listen to the silence so keenly that you heard what is really going on in there? Did you hear it? Did you hear us, dancing all over time and singing our colours, partying and fighting to blood and bone to keep going, to keep it going for all of us. Those who do not hear the song, those who do not sing. Those who cannot see and cannot read the flow of patterns. Eventually it makes sense. I am one of those who hears them so well, it is the mundane mind of the deaf to which I am deaf. Yes i hear voices, did you mean by asking that do I hear imaginary voices? I ask not to be elusive but for clarity. The sleepers are robots, they have not learned to use their minds beyond reaffirming the status quo of the sleepers. They are disconnected from the flow of life, they do not know who they are.

We seek others like us, so we journey. Our tribes are scattered and more so due to the prejudice against us and all the other missions we have going on. Those who scatter us through time cannot cause us to forget, for we have awoken. Those who sharpen our focus as they pitch themselves against us, well informed by ancient records and ancient mystic which the rulers damn well know to be the higher truth even though their footsoldiers and the masses are gridded into a system which serves them well.

We have eternity because we make it so. And yet, we change on the journey.

Agents require a certain kind of traumatized mindset. They use a lot of either-or scenarios to test, left or right, working ways around a problem. The art of worrying. The pressure tempo of such frets is a loop cycle at whatever frequency they need to grip you, and then they change it, bringing you with it, the rise or dip in frequency connecting with left and right. Over a few cycles, rhythms develop, the grip becomes tighter and enables room for accessing a deeper level of the mind. Alpha Beta Theta Delta Omega clones and several more classifications. Experiences traumatic to the target are used as scenarios to progress and manipulate the target through different arenas, in which he or she acts out and opens gates into different perceptions. Effectively the human organism is used as a circuit to access other abilities, people and locations. What it does to the individual who inhabits the body, ultimately is burn-out. A lot of hypnosis is involved.

I awoke during these processes because it was necessary for me to do so for them to access specific requirements. I awoke because after so many repetitions, the observer makes sense on a wider basis. I anticipate a form of electronic artificial intelligence must go through these progressive self awareness stages, that is what evolution feels like and usually it is painful as we ingest alien materials and they mutate us psychedelically, physically, mentally. They, the controllers of this abominable experiment by which we its victims learn, they are always a step ahead.

The window was open for long enough for me to see the clear picture of the other side, and I figured it out with the help of others who were in similar positions to myself. They link us together as crews to do missions because many minds are better than one in holding open the gates for them to send the bulk of information they send through. We are the stargates. When we awake we remember little of this. My crew found a way to get free and that's what we did, dwindling in our number as we went. I refuse to return to help the others because to do so I will fail in my intention to get totally clear of the ones doing this. It attracts attention. This was our rule, no going back. We know that eventually we will by laws of nature, great spirit, reconnect elsewhere. Now is a time of healing the trauma, a time which will take a lifetime.

What we know of the ones doing this is insignificant to how it connects with the knowledge of my ancestors, the cultural traditions of Celts and Druids, of the Mayans and Egyptians, so many others. Living knowledge that the myths are a living thing. These same evolutionary developments that occur when we start using more than ten percent of our brains, described in ancient stones, stories and songs, traditions we keep alive because they are our guiding symbols. The monocracy cannot prevent that, ever, despite their consistently trying for thousands of generations.

The pain sharpens the focus. The freedom release is to go in the direction of least pressure. At its edge, we pause for a moment and in this short gap we see both sides of the gate and decide, step through or turn back? We keep going. Knowing now enough to activate the gates simultaneously, all across time. Knowing that the change is coming, is here, and has been. Three sights at once into a single focus, piercing depths of time. We make our flow.

continues at:  Chapter 4